i'm looking forward to it, friday night. hope i can go every friday night, save the one i will miss for my poetry intensive, there i would rather be. there i would rather be.
i have to go to work soon, but i'm trying not to lose sight of the things i must accomplish in the near future. getting that dissertation off my plate is a major one. sat down for about five hours last night inputting edits and feel no closer to resolution. editing is a very nitpicky kind of thing. very much the devil in the details.
this is why i haven't had time for it. i just don't have that kind of attention to devote at the moment. it will be the last editing job i do for a while...save the one my friend is not willing to let me do. tell me i can't do something and i'll make time for it. she's writing a smut novel, and i can't wait to get my hands on it. i'm hoping she'll let me publish it for her and that it will be the first of many such happy ventures. for her, i would make the time. for her, anything.
i must to work, have to decide where to speak up about things that are not by the book, and where to let it ride. perhaps there will be room for dialogue about these things. the ship is pretty loosely run, so i'm not sure what can be done about that.
my major miss my first close was the floors. they looked like hell. but i deep cleaned all the food prep areas, which needed it, and that to me makes more sense. i am only one person and just ran out of steam.
i did the floors, mind you. had the kid i was working with do them. but by the time i went to double check his work, it was game over time for me. i was wiped.
what do we have to do now?he asked.
if we haven't done it, we're not doing it.i said. and we left for the night. i was fried.
i wasn't surprised that was what they called me on, i was surprised it was all they called me on. not that i was so sloppy, but my standards are very high and i am trying to be reasonable with myself most of all. i work myself to a bloody nub quite well and i'm just not willing to do that anymore.
rules, boundaries, and limitations.yes ceasar. i hear you.
but it's nearly time to go, i've got another outfit for residency, but still have about five days to figure out. maybe i'll just do leather pants, but how hot will it be in july in mass? perhaps very. i better take a cool alternative.
one time at a powwow i packed only warm clothes. like a dork. and i couldn't gourd dance that weekend because it was too warm for what i brought, plus draping a polyester double layered shawl completely around your body would have been too much. so i goofed off all weekend. it was still a great powwow. one of my favorites, but i always have to dance. what can i say...
this thursday i'm reading a poem at clifton commons barnes and noble. then sunday i get to go to a festival of journals. it's a few hours and about thirty or so literary publications are there with readers. shmooze time. i'll not shmooze, but i'm starting to know people, so i'll gladly go and say hello to those i adore.
my poetry intensive is just a couple weeks away, and i can't wait. it's been too long. too, too long. though i've needed the rest. six months is a long time. but i've got a bottle of jd all ready to smuggle in to the convent. ha!
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