beloved enemy

i have a dear relation whom i communicate with and many times it is a painful exchange. i love this person. i want to be in relationship with this person. i've read boundaries, i know there are times when we must draw the line, but i said something to my sister in regards to this that struck me as truth.

i don't think the Lord really cares if i get along with my pastor or not. it is that relative who is causing me pain that He cares about. i don't think the Lord really cares if i get along with my pastor's wife, or whomever "godly" and "acceptable" i may be working to get along with, but i think He really cares about my disagreements with my beloved enemy.

think about it. whom did Jesus surround Hislovelyself with? sinners, tax-collectors, prostitues, all manner of heathen great and small. the Physician did not come to heal the healthy, but He came for the ones the healthy shun. the ones deemed rabble and unworthy of the attentions of godly folk.

this causes me to shudder. i don't want have friends in all the right places, as the world sees it. i want to befriend and love whom Jesus would have me befriend and love. this is very difficult. these are the people who ask too much, too loudly, too often. these are the ones others don't want to give the time of day. these are the ones who forget social graces and walk their own path. i forget that i am one of these ones too. i don't fit in either. i have a sneaking suspicion none of us really fit in. we all just think "they" do. the elusive, exclusive, they.

even when i do have dear friends, i feel myself a sojourner on a path somewhere with a temporary companion. i have learned one thing about friendships, and that is, they are brief. even those that i've had for years, are too brief for my taste.

changing subjects to something i've been pondering for weeks:

i have some friends who purge their homes of every thing that "could be" evil. movies, music, books, everything. i have done this before so i understand their thinking. but if they are eliminating a book just because it has a witch in it, why aren't they getting rid of the Bible?

my issue, i guess is, we go so far in the direction of trying to keep ourselves unsullied, that i think we focus too much on the sullying and forget the beautiful Lord. clearly, evil exists in the Bible. clearly devils, and witches, and raising the dead all exist in the Bible. of course we aren't to dabble with them, but God isn't afraid to tell us they exist, so why do we act like we must purge all these things from our lives when the very Bible we hold infallible has them in its very pages?

still haven't finished jonah, chapter four but i've some interesting insights the Lord has been sharing with me. they aren't ready to be writ just yet though.