objective five

having finally finished my graduate lecture, and in spite of my av presentation being lost in translation, literally, i had a few celebratory drinks. my sister went home with my ex, and i fell asleep early. now it's past midnight and i'm awake. not wide awake, just awake.

life last week versus life this week. night and day.

each moment i seem to have a new realization of what a horrible job packing i did. some of what i thought i packed for residency is packed for cali, which only further complicates things. but yesterday was fun. tiring, but fun.

back up to objective three, returning the rental car. my pony, it seems has finally succumbed to some serious issues, and is in the shop getting a transmission rebuild. i had to race around and figure out how to get my sister from newark airport, how to get us to boston, how to get us home again, while having my pony serviced back in ny. it has been non stop.

life was distilled down to a list of objectives. objective one. get to newark. objective two, get to massachusets. objective three, return rental car. it was the only way i could manage what was beginning to feel like chaos.


then my sister and i walk around boston and i don't realize how tired i will be, until i have to stay up until 11pm preparing for my lecture, then wake up at 5:30 am, and continue preparing. but my lecture went real well, those who attended said they were glad they did. i hope to have gifted these writers with something they can use.

i feel as if there is now a respite, that the whirlwind which has carried me will settle for a few days. i have no particular agenda, no list of things to do, until friday when i have my graduate reading. what to read is settled, i just have to time it.

tomorrow starts the round of workshops in earnest, we had a rare free day from workshops since our prof will be arriving saturday. i'm grateful for that. though there are so many of us graduating, and the pressure is off, so it's nice being here. i'm finding connections to a lot of people i haven't had so much luck getting to know until now.

objective five, may or may not have been my graduate lecture. but it is done now. i am mostly recovered from the exhaustion of getting here, and soon, i'll drift off to sleep again only to awake and reenter residency life in heart and mind.

but for now, in the stillness of my dorm room, i realize what the exhaustion has masked and i'm grateful for it all.