persona non grata

seems i'm welcome again, where once i wasn't.
that's a nice change. i hate leaving a place with misunderstanding, but sometimes
absence is all that can change perspective.

so, i walked away, as i'm inclined to do.

i know how to leave. how to sashay out a door
leaving only the scent of patchouli.

i'm wide awake now, i will likely force myself into forward motion
and do what need be done. what i've been putting off.

i need to check my mail, i don't get around to that but once a month, if that.
but it isn't good practice. and i've been hauling my ex's letters around for longer than that, i'm sure he thinks i'm up to something. no, just busy.

my girl is happy though. if that's any measure of success.
and i would say, it's the only measure.

i have learned there are things which i cannot do.

i opted out of a performance on halloween, i cannot make it to practices
and the thought of trying exhausts me. so if just the thought of something wears me out, i best not do that thing.

i'm still gathering finishing touches for my current outfit, i just ordered a new hip scarf because mine is flinging coins like crazy and i want to look perfect.

we'll see. i'm told my outfit the way it is is perfect
but i've got a few other ideas i have yet to try.

feeling the tired now. i close again tonight, don't mind.
but then again, there are reasons now for me to be home before the sun goes down.

i have stated those reasons plainly, and we'll see if anything happens.
right now, my work situation is improving. a lot of changes have to be made and i really don't think my current manager is able to implement those changes. i certainly can't given my station. so, who will? remains to be seen.

i'm over killing myself for that place, so when i got the call on my only day off since last wednesday, i refused becuase i won't get another day off until sunday (that would be some ungodly number of days in a row, sure it's overtime pay, but i'd be a raving bitch by the end of it, then who will help me?)

overtime is nice, but sleep is better. and i passed out weds night after leaving pilates early (because i completely ran out of juice), and slept from 7:30pm to 12:30 the next day. wasted tired.

it is well. i don't feel so bad today, hence, being up to see the kiddo off.

life is good. regardless of what they say.

i'm still looking forward to arizona. P.L.A.Y. time.

can't wait.