theology vs. relationship

this is an idea that wanted to be written. a thought i had one day. as with all my other stuff, this is a first draft, largely unedited, i just find misspellings basically and move on. i have been told to submit it here or there, but i just don't care to. so enjoy!


Having worked under seminary trained pastors, and anointed pastors who are not necessarily scholars, (see C. Peter Wagner’s Changing Church for further information on these distinctions), and having attended churches of both types of pastors, I am of the opinion that right relationship will right wrong theology, however, right theology will not necessarily right wrong relationship.

Pastors and laymen alike, who have their relationship with Jesus as the impetus of their lives will, by virtue of that relationship, have their theological errors set aright. As we draw nearer to God, and the Holy Spirit leads us into “all truth” (Jn 16:13) wrong theology falls away. However, those who hang their hopes on their seminary degrees or defendable theological positions do not necessarily reap the benefits of right relationship with the Lord.

At churches and in books, there is a great emphasis on teaching or righting theology. What I see lacking is the intimate relational time spent with the Lord, demonstrated for me to emulate. Great divisions in the church are the result, I believe, of this focus on theology. If the body of Christ behaved like a body, was in true relationship with one another across denominational lines, then our theological differences would pale in comparison to our love for one another. Our relationships would overshadow our theological differences.

How many times has your theological position been changed by being confronted and challenged? How many times has the Lord revealed His will to you by having you serve, love, and humble yourself for your brother? I find the latter the most prevalent way the Lord deals with me. I believe Mary of Bethany would say the same.

Mary of Bethany sat at the feet of Jesus to listen to His words, because she loved Him. She was captivated by His love for her. Jesus never rebukes Mary for any of her theological positions. He simply loves Her and defends her, when she lavishes Him with her love (Jn 12:13). Mary seems to me a type of the servants and children we are to be. When Lazarus died, Mary fell to Jesus’ feet (Jn 11:32) where she was comfortable. She is a portrait of how every believer’s relationship with the Lord must come before all else.

Zaccheus was another sinner, tax collector, with whom Jesus shared dinner and relationship (Lk 19:3). What was the result of this relationship? Zaccheus repented, made fourfold restitution, and gave half his goods to the poor. Jesus was not about mingling with the scholars, with those who knew every jot and tiddle of His Word; He wanted relationship with the broken (Lk 5:31).

The scholars of the day, Scribes and Pharisees, were so well versed in the law, so pure in practice, that they would not eat at the homes of non-Pharisees, for they could not be assured some transgression in ritual preparation had not been committed (Mt 23:25). What is Jesus’ response to this lavish adherence to tradition and law? He called them “whited sepulchres,” “serpents,” “generation of vipers,” and asked, “how can you escape the damnation of hell?” (Mt 23:27, 33). Clearly, if theological knowledge alone were the way to the heart of God, Jesus would have mentioned it (or at least commended them for it).

What is the way to the heart of God? Right theology has been hailed as the way, but I believe the answer lies in relationship. Right relating to the Lord. Right relating to each other. When the Lover of our Souls came to earth, He did not only come to preach and exegete scripture. The vast majority of His dealings were the stuff of relationship: weeping for Lazarus, feeding multitudes, holding little children, and healing infirmities. Miraculous acts indeed, but moreso because in each instance the Pharisees were off studying, while God in flesh was relating.

Please do not hear that right theology has no value. Indeed it does. I shudder at the lack of basic Bible knowledge in the church, but know pounding theology and impressing others with my Bible knowledge is not the way to effect change. Right relating is. I am certain, that as I get down and relate to children in Sunday school, or discuss issues with other adults, or ask the pastor why he believes thus and such, through that relating, which has come only from investment of time and energies in the stuff of life, that theology is changed.

My way of changing theology is not the non-stop, surefire way, but it is, I believe, the way Jesus modeled. I have learned more from pastors and teachers who befriended and loved me enough to model their theology, to be the flesh on the bones of their theology, than from those pastors who merely exegete a few passages and throw a few Greek words at me. There is a place for the scholars, but I believe we have elevated scholars and theologians, setting them apart to such a degree we have lost ability to communicate with them.

The speech of the common man falters in a group of theologians, and only by relationship can the breach be bridged. Tim Attaway, a pastor of a Vineyard Church once said, “Get your seminary degree, then get over it.” Don’t try to impress the church with Greek, which has no bearing on our lives, but feed the hungry, dine with the unlovely, and be the shepherd of souls that will result in right relating to God and the body. Theology will then, by virtue of living example, be set aright.