Tuesday, January 09, 2007

oh, no!

there is a poem i wrote some time back. about things i don't want to know. i learned one of those things tonight. my sister gave me a membership to a gym. they checked my oil and looked under the hood, introduced me to the machines and told me my body fat index. oh Lord, that i could have done without.

i've never been thin, but i'm short. so on those graph charts that say how thin you should be, i should weigh something i've weighed only once when i was ten probably. (see, i'm trying to do all this without spilling my digits. very delicate digits there).

i applied for my passport today. the lady told me,
they are probably going to reject your signature.

great,
i said,
what do i do? that is my signature.


you remember those spirographs from back in the day? they make those swirly patterns? well, that is how my signature looks. so i said,
please photocopy my social so they can see that i actually sign that way.
and she did, said,
it might help.

can you photocopy my license? it's signed that way there too?


no, they can access it.
she said.
it looks like a child's scribble, not to be demeaning.

she was trying to be nice, honesty is brutal sometimes. if i can dish it out, i sure as hell better learn to take it, eh?

i've hung it up over at ma. i was a burden i think. something about setting myself up as the wounded artist. i don't know that it is a show. it just is. i'm a wreck. how it comes across on the page, if i seem to be feigning woundedness, i don't know. but i do know it was time for me to walk away from yet another group.

i read to a crowd of hardened nj poets the other night. i was so well recieved that it is hard for me to miss anyone passing from my life these days. there is just so much happening in terms of art.

when i went to the gym tonight the lady sharing my delicate digits asked me,
what is your occupation?

poet.
i said.

i've never met a poet before.


hopefully, it will go well, i will drag myself back to the gym where i was rebuked for not drinking enough water (i drink tea and coffee.
they dehydrate you,
she says.
you must drink water!)


fine. fine. and i must work out three times a week. it will help my head. i've needed a new diversion. excercise will do.

7 comments:

Miss Audrey said...

Oh my, so we are getting in shape together are we? I'm amused. At your expense mind you as I have no one looking at my digits except for me. My strategy is diet. I'll do the diet and you get to do the exercise! Aren't we quite the team?

I took a tape and measured all of the great parts of Audrey. Oh, my! I waited a week and only checked on my tummy measurement. It was two inches thicker! I must have been holding it in as tight as I could for the first measurement and dared to be a little more honest with the second! I won't be checking again until I can see a difference on how my jeans button up... hopefully see the difference!

MA will miss the sauciness of your posts Suz. As far as being wounded, we are what we are.(I'm not claiming your woundedness, but allowing it.) We can't become anything for anyone that we really aren't and stay true to ourselves. I'm a fundamentalist Christian and you know it, but I'm in your corner. Always was, always will be. You don't offend me. Seems to me that the bottom line for the end times is offense. Check out John 6:66. His followers were greatly offended and left off from following him. I'm not your disciple, but I still choose not to be offended. I don't always agree with you, but I believe that you have a right to your opinions and path of faith. I'll bet when push comes to shove God would much rather have a child that is open and caring over a child that is starchy, overbearing and judgmental.

I'm proud to know you and blessed to be able to call you my friend.

Anonymous said...

yea, what she said! Other than the jean thing lol

siouxsiepoet said...

friends,
thank you for your love and support. the people over at ma are good and decent folk. i am just astounded at the battle lines that get drawn. lets draw none here. i am to blame for this happening, and i'm sorry.

happy dieting audrey.
suz.

Mary DeMuth said...

i'll miss you suz

siouxsiepoet said...

mare, you have been the truest of friends to me always.

i will miss you too. but our friendship does not end here. it is just beginning.

praise God.
suz.

Donna J. Shepherd said...

You had me laughing out loud talking about the measuring. I should be about 6'8" to balance out my weight. lol!

Good for you in your endeavor to become healthier. I've been trying to do that myself for the last 2 or 3 months.

Glad to hear your poetry reading went well. Praise God!

Donna

Miss Audrey said...

Just for clarification:

I hold no ill will towards anyone over at MA. I've seen support for you by the buckets full and the controversies were just a bit winded sometimes in my opinion. I know and understand that no one meant any harm.