giddy

last night, i watched my favorite show, which acutally ran tuesday night, but i taped it because i don't like watching commercials. i have so much want and desire in my life all ready without subjecting myself to advertising.

(why is it, when there is finally a quiet moment to sit and think peacefully, a neighbor starts up a mower? why? I ask you. now the question becomes, do i shut the window to block out the noise and be a trifle hot, or leave it open and get the sounds of machination coursing through my brain while i'm trying to write? sigh. i do miss country living).

so my favorite show is last comic standing. i love stand up. anyone who can make me laugh, guffaw, split my side, close my eyes and squeeze out a few tears, from an otherwise stonefaced person, is pretty wonderful in my book. the only bummer about this show is the standup is so choppy, and jay mohr isn't hosting this season. i'd taken a liking to him the past three seasons.

rescue me started up again, and it is bittersweet but dennis leary is wickedly funny. i enjoy that show but it's not for everyone. life in the shadow of 9-11.

i'm finally printing out my poems for this weekend, gathering up the last few bits of stuff i'll take with me. cleaning house, and setting my sights on the future.

i cannot remember a time i was so utterly delighted. last night, laughing with the comedians, i couldn't believe it. it was a great day yesterday. spent talking much of poetry, cleaning my daughter's room (disaster area that it was, and i didn't lose my temper once! miracles abound).

it is all good. have i said that lately? i don't think so. have i thought that lately? i try, often but may not outwardly express it. my task from this point until sometime mid sunday, is to be present for every moment, every jot and every tiddle of the poetry intensive. to mingle with the group. this is the first time i'll be spending a whole weekend with only poets. about twenty, i believe. i've gone back and forth over a great many things in my mind, and mostly, i think i'll just try to be me, for better or worse. and let the rest unfold before my waking eyes.

it's all good.