stranger days

it's curious, how life happens. i'm not sure i understand it and when i think i'm beginning to, something happens. it all shapeshifts on me and i'm baffled again.

but that's alright, maybe it's better this way. like finding that field of flowers unexpectedly.
maybe that is where the wonder lies, in the unknown. the unknowable.

i have to keep heading in the direction i think i'm supposed to go, but living on the east coast has robbed me my navigational savvy. i used just head opposite the beach and be going east. though that didn't serve me well on some occasions, when it most counted--i guess in terms of onlookers it "mattered"--i say this because once at a powwow, we were all camping together. and everyone pointed their tent doors east. so i plop mine down, not realizing i could just point my door the same direction as everyone else's, so i go west.

the good thing about that was, it worked for me.

maybe that's my direction, opposite of the crowd. whatever that means. though it sounds pretty predictable, and i don't like predictable.

so i sat by the river this morning, had a lovely cup of tea on the porch, and somehow lost my groove midday. though i've just had a hot soak and hope i'll find it again.

what to do, maybe the opposite of what everyone else is doing.

maybe not.