finished

i have finally finished death shroud. it is ten movements long. you will have to buy my book to read it if you have not seen it all ready.

i have finally received word on my poetry collection, and the word is good.

what does that mean for publication? not much, unfortunately.

will i self-publish? most likely. for there are really no publishers who publish poetry, which i find to be ironic.

this moment, is for me, a summit experience. one, whose opinion i value as a poet, writer, editor, likes my work. i find myself entirely elated at the prospect. but at the same time, nothing has changed. i am the poet i was two days ago before i knew he liked my stuff.

the challenge now is, to find a printer and do my book up right. to move forward and not delay. the time is now, the time is now.

i've had this need to get myself on paper of late. as if there were something i am chronicalling. what that is i am not sure i can say from this vantage point, but likely, i'll look back and say,

yes. i understand now.

my dear cyber pastor says, he would like to help me get my "message out."

i was telling an artist today,

i wonder what that message is. would someone please tell me what my message is, so i can know.

she laughed. i laughed. i genuinely do not know from one moment to the next what i will say or do. how the Lord will lead or guide.

i find it interesting though, that i did not edit out the works that my dear poet friend i trust told me to edit out. i let them keep their place in my collection.

these were among some of the works singled out by the one i respect beyond words.

it goes to show that when you have created something, and even though those whose judgment you trust say,

no, don't do that.

you must still be yielded to the Spirit. be open to His leading. be listening for His call.

my other dear friend who essentially said,

don't publish it at all,

(and whose opinion i still value), caused me to question myself and ask,

what do i do Lord?

i move forward. i press in. i trust.

that is what i always do. and so far, it has worked for me.

we still have no work. i am still unpublished.

but God is still on the throne, and that soothes me more than anything.

i did not get "chosen" to teach at a big writers' conference this year, but my works are now going there, at the hand of a chosen one. i find God to be in this as well. i find His ways wonderfully discombobulating.

i would have it no other way.