first snow

leaving work tonight i drove from rain into snow, the first gently fluttering flakes of the season, it was downright heartwarming.

too bad i don't have anyone to share it with.

my girl crept out of bed to say good night to me and i told her. she jumped up and down a few times, then crept back to bed because she was cold.

i pile the layers on and prepare for another late night.

schoolwork keeps me up. sleeplessness is my companion.
i seem to only want to sleep when i have to get up.
but just in from work and i'm bright eyed and bushy tailed.

they want to offer me more money to stay, but i keep saying, no. don't.

i need to leave there. i must leave there.

tonight a customer started yelling at us, and when she was leaving, i went up to her and told her it was inappropriate for her to yell at us. she was mumbling and grumbling but i'm tired of taking shit from people who don't know how to treat hardworking underpaid servicepersons.

another lady i met shook my hand, just the second time that has happened at work, and i must say, it's damn refreshing. to have some stranger shake your hand and introduce themselves, it's unexpected and restores my faith in human decency.

we get the whole gamut, thieves and the honest. meanies and ladies so kind it makes you all melty inside.

mostly we get the meanies though. or at least those are the ones we remember.

why is that? perhaps it's the footprint they leave behind.

good kind people are like good hikers, you never know they are there until they pass you by. the yammering kind of hikers i can live without (had to avoid many of them the other day out with my girl).

the line from a poem, when in the forest, speak no louder than a tree kept coming to me. i kept trying to honor that sentiment and shut my mouth. but it was also a time for me and my girl to be together.

so i talked with her.

and the hike leaders. them i don't mind.
but i realized, i don't really like people in general. except the people i love. them i would give my i-teeth for. but the rest of humanity, not so much.

a hermitage somewhere is what i need, a reclusive pasture to be away from people is my ideal. driving around new york today, i was amazed at how anyone could ever want to live elsewhere.

one other kind customer said,

then you'd really like kentucky, it's more beautiful than this.

i can't even imagine anything more beautiful than new york right now.

first snow, wish i had someone to share it with.
peace.