look into my eyes

i have always felt the honesty with which i convey myself is an asset, never a liability. because when shit is said about me, and i'm innocent, i believe it shows in my face, in my eyes.

my boss, the young mgr. who i struggled with before, asked me if i was talking about her.

and i said,

absolutely not.

someone said i was, but what that someone heard was someone else talking about her to me.

i said nothing in return and took notes of the things she needed to know and left the notes for her.

it helped that i had left her the notes because it only made my point more clear that i was not trying to stab her in the back.

if i work for or with someone, i'm going to make them look good. it makes me look good to make them look good. if i'm a complete slacker (which i'm not), then that hurts me alone. i think. but my work ethic is old school.

it's tough working with kids, and i understand why the kid informed. he thought he was being loyal.

but i told my boss,

i will listen to anything anyone has to say, even if i don't agree.

and my face tells no lies.

i cannot lie. i do not lie.

why?

i think that is why people trust me. i hope it is, anyway.

so her concerns were eased and she said,

i trust you, that is why i let you do whatever you want.

i work my ass off, that is why she lets me do whatever i want.

i know it's tough for the crew of kids who all trained together to have to take direction from the newbie, but that's the way it is.

so she tells them,

do what she says.

and my management training goes in fits and spurts, i had hoped to be on the fast track, but the fast track isn't so fast.

i ain't going anywhere, so it's no trouble for me. but she wants me certified now. and that's good news.

as for the poetic end. i have a potential advisor who is the bomb. a bio to impress anyone and he respects my work as i respect his.

trouble is, he isn't the poet i was focusing on for this semester but he wants to school me in prosody, which he excels at.

perhaps i shall have to do another intensive poetry study under the other poet.

this is the semester though to explore how a poem means.

and to dabble in forms. why not, hey, i need a challenge.

the key is, to make it interesting.

writing in a form can be so tedious (the reading of it, i mean)
but to make it engaging and contemporary. there's your challenge, while adhering to the rules.

i'm excited. school has been an excellent tonic.

and i'm drunk on life right now.

but still watching the horizon.

peace.