rush and hurry

i feel on the edge of an eddie that will soon suck me in and i'll be swirling for months, i keep trying to avoid the rush and hurry until it is inescapable. but my schedule is filling up, and my time is diminishing rapidly. my free time, that is.

but the good news is, all this running around has helped the waistline, another inch gone. i put on my full belly dance outfit last night, it has been in the back of my closet since i got it. i only put it on once. i had a great many plans for it, but it was nice to see it on. and it looks better now than it did a year and a half ago, that's for sure.

now i'm buying some last components, and having been at that gathering, seeing the ladies actually dance, (they had a couple coreographed routines they did), it made me wonder if i can actually do this, but at the same time, watching them, made me sure i could do this.

does everyone's doubt come housed in confidence as mine does?

i'm sure i don't know.

but the major thing is isolations. i have been working on my isolations for the past year and a half. i should be able to put a dance together, no problem. it's now just a matter of doing it. i have a full semester to work out the kinks. and now, lots of resources.

there is something to be said about a clan of women dancing. it's a beautiful thing. and i think about how much there is to do, how much going on, so many pressures and intrigues, all of it demanding my time and attention. but the focus next semester is on this one dance.

and it's kind of exciting.

plus that huge paper i have to write, but papers have never been a problem for me. now it's a matter of structuring my arguments and trying to get some linear flow to my thoughts. which seem more comfortable in a circular progression. but that must not be how this paper comes forth. it has to lay out flat, or i have to work it out so it at least has a linear thread.

this paper and my dance. that is the whole of next semester and i try to push it from my mind now, but it comes to me, i see it. i got an image of my dance today and it was wonderful.

now i must to the pool with my girl, but first, to eat. i neglect eating, and i that has never been a healthy option.

now, i'm hungry and my body demands that i eat. but here i sit, writing.

peace. out.