the verdict is

today my girl's riding instructor told me, quietly, she is likely going to leave the farm she's got five horses stabled at, and go to one just a bit farther from us. but what's ten more minutes to get to those you love? the owner of the current farm is simply nuts. there is no other way to put it. and i finally heard it from nicole's ears myself.

i'm sadly relieved. but my bittersweet life continues. i won't get to see bucky anymore. and this leaves me sad.

but i understand why. will he?

if i have to lose someone or something, instead of my girl, so be it. that is always the way a parent would go.

as we were driving from the farm today, my girl said,

we have to bring the camera and get lots of photos of bucky.

this may be the last time i see him, (except that my new tat happens to feature his glorious mug, and that of his stablemate, prince.

i had to find some way to keep them near me forever, and as luck would have it, i got it done, and i'm grateful for it.)

one cannot know what one will lose in this life, we can only cherish what we have been given. be close to it for as long as we can, and try to remember, my mantra,

that which is mine will come to me.

i'm greatly relieved, and i'm sure, some time today, or late tonight, when i do my reckoning, i will find it incredibly sad that i can't see bucky anymore. but he is not my charge. and i have been faithful with what i have been given.

there is nothing else for me to do, except walk away.

that has always been what it comes to for me.

and while i leave with five, no, six, new companions. i wish there were one or two more who were going to be physically present with me in our new haunts.

what will these eyes see? where will we go? whom will we meet?

i do not know.

my girl is going to be preparing for her first show. and bandit welcomes my handling. he's yielding more and more to my touch, and i'm grateful for his trust. he is an innocent.

but then, so is bucky.

peace. out.