ache my feet

not my heart! oh, let it be so. let it be so.

and, it is. my feet are throbbing, that's for sure. first time at this job that i've felt this way. but i've never done this forty hour gig before now. today, a kid simply didn't show up for his shift tonight and i was left holding the bag.

you can't leave,

the other girl said.

i'm not going to leave you alone,

i told her.

but i'm sitting down.

i was wiped. so i took my braids out and put my feet on a chair, because after eight plus hours of standing, one needs to sit.

i was all giddy by the end, and moving at a snails pace, making a mess--serious messes. and we had kind understanding customers. they were patient and laughing. i was glad. one guy came in and he said,

i was here earlier and the line was out the door, but you still served me quickly, so i can wait.

thank you!

i said. and he waited.

i've got all the time in the world,

he said.

and i was just so grateful. because when you can only move so fast, there is nothing impatience is going to do but make it worse.

then, mercifully, i got a call from nicole, it finally went down and she's leaving the farm, meaning, i won't see bucky again.

but i'm too tired to miss him just yet, and maybe somehow, if a miracle happens, i can visit him. maybe.

i was hoping to spend the winter visiting him like i did last winter. it was very comforting. and i will miss him. i will miss him with my whole soul. but for now, my feet are all that matters.

so my boss, my poor, sweet boss is having to come in to close tonight after leaving yesterday and saying, don't call me suzanne.

and i didn't. the other girl did.

and so, he's closing tonight and i'm opening tomorrow. 4am. yay!

but i'm wiped now.

gotta veg then to bed as soon as the benedryl kicks in.

thank god for ibuprofen. this is what i love. this is what i love.

but this is not all i love...