a pound returns

so, i haven't even had time to sleep, let alone workout this month. only three times i've made it to the gym. finally went today and only a pound of gelatinousness has returned. which makes me happy. i've not been behaving any worse, just sans working out. so i'm glad to see it didn't take me down the bad road. i get close to this particular number i've only broken once, and then head in the other direction. i'd like to break then pass that number. i think with all the belly dancing this semester that will happen. i missed my class last semester, but i'm looking forward to the old familiar routine again.

and if i can stay after class and practice, bringing along a large mirror, i will. i just don't have the space here at home, plus, i'm never alone. but i'll practice here, it's just easier to have a space that is private.

i had dreams of eagles last night. and then the large, huge crow who frequents my trees woke me. i wanted to talk to him, but i couldn't find him. i think he lifted off before i actually came to. he's nearly two feet, a huge crow. his caw is loud, as you can imagine. and when i hear him, i reply, and we go back and forth.

but if i'm in dreamland with eagles, it's hard to talk to the crow that wakes me. but i'm glad he did, i've been meaning to get to the gym.

and i keep waiting for that which i lost to return to me. to finally touch it again, to hear the ocean in a seashell, and to feel, to feel something other than pain.

i look forward to that. and there is so much to say, but i can say none of it here.

choose the right time.

i must away. pool today. then work.
i have to play some, as well as work. or i get crabby.

my calves look amazing though, very cut. hope the rest of me gets that way.

peace, out.