hold on loosely

i walked the big girl to the paddock today. nicole showed me how to fly spray her, since she's afraid of the squeezy bottle, i have to wipe her down. putting her fly mask on is more of an under the chin affair, and i believe she will be kind to me. she was today. she has been in the times i've handled her before, though i've never walked her until today. unclipping her chain lead from the halter took longer than i'd like, but on my second try, i got it. the trick is, getting out of her way before she kicks and runs off into the pasture.

she's beautiful though.

i don't lock down on the rope and yank her down the road, that's just foolish, if you ask me. so i walked beside her, calmly, holding the rope gently. i wouldn't want someone yanking me around. and so, i try to respect her. her gentleness comes out.

and i keep hearing how hard it is to catch velvet in the field. she has never, not once run away from me. she always just stands as i approach, or walks to the gate to meet me. my girl says because i'm essentially what she has to settle for. but i like to think she understands. and i approach her with great love and respect. she understands this. i went to her today and bitty let out a holler, to call me back. apparently my minimassage was not enough, or she just wanted another. and so i went back and gave her another. i walked away from her at one point, to the other side of her stall and stood there, just to see what she would do, and she walked over and stood beside me. i don't want to force my affection on them. but if they want it, they've got it in spades.

and bitty gave herself over to my scratching, and i stood beside her and wrapped my arms around her, and rubbed her, she was hot so i hosed her down and tried to clean her up a bit, i don't know why, she rolled in the dirt immediately after i turned her out. but she was happy. i let her graze a bit, and nicole says she just hasn't had time to do much of that, so i asked her if it's alright if we spend time with the horses grazing them. she said,

sure. thank you.

it was wicked hot today, and we left the farm after handling the horses, because it was too hot to work and that is our prerogative, we are not owners, so we left. it is more urgent to me to help when they are standing in their unmucked stalls. i have to do something then, but this way, nicole has all day and her husband was there.

plus, i've got a week of it coming and i'm ready to--

man this guy got bucked off at 7.3 seconds and it was a great ride, but it was not meant to be. he would have gotten an amazing score.

--do the work. i'm looking forward to it, actually. i have to press in and get to the books, i've got a lot of reading to do and a major essay to write. the question is, what to say. my journey to this point has been, um, interesting. i'm not yet feeling the freedom with this current prof to spill it.

so i may just write something detached, but i don't really know how to do that, there's the dilemma.

i just have to wait for the answer to present itself. it always does. and i'm always grateful.

and i went to get bunny, whom i hold like a baby in my arms, and carried him to my chair. he closes his eyes and his back feet drop, so his belly is completely exposed. he stayed with me this way, even with my girl poking and tickling him, until he was tired of it, then flipped over, about five minutes into the chill session. and then, when he was tired of that, he groomed himself for a minute in my lap, and then hopped off and ran back to his cage.

it's tough being cute i guess. but the fur coat might also have something to do with it, as i said, it's wicked hot.

peace. out.