they come and go

my days off, that is. almost as fast as they arrive, they're gone. but i've got today. i hope to make the most of it, reading. i've not progressed much further on the work for this packet, but today i will finish a book. i will force myself!

and i'm even enjoying the books, it's not that. it's an oversaturation thing. too much on my mind already. too much mental clutter. but not the unimportant clutter, the big heavy dovetailed wooden furniture kind of clutter. the i will not be moved kind of clutter.

what can i say, it is what it is. i just have to find my way through it. the sun is shining and it is well.

a friend invited me to a belly dance event, where i could actually perform if i wanted to.

just email,

she said.

no. i am not there yet.

it's just for fun.

i know, but it is more serious to me than that. i don't want to do anything i will not be comfortable with later.

i have not decided who i will dance for first. when that will happen, though it needs to happen by december. i am still working it out. i likely won't perform publicly because that is not what it's about for me. we'll see.

i have an idea, but only time will tell. i'm now debating on whether or not i'll do the intensive in december. i can't affort to pay and not go, but i can't really afford to take the time off work either.

so many decisions to make. perhaps, this year, i'll just see what happens and do the best i can.