Tuesday, April 20, 2010


the poems are coming hard and fast, which is good, because i need them. i also need to write a critical paper (short) for monday. haven't even begun. but i've been thinking about it (or avoiding the thoughts of it, depending on how well you know my process) for the entire month. now, to trust my process.

and i do. it's just the deadlines and i look ahead to my work week and know it will be tough. that i'll have to wring it out of my mind at some point, usually these papers just fall out of my head, but lately, i've had to do some wringing. i think because i'm forcing myself through so much so fast at the moment.

today i got stood up for an appointment, and while i was sitting in this mob cafe (at least it had that feel to it), the most beautiful black man walked in, he had his hair in a bright yellow geri cap i think they are called, and he was dark. he walked in and smiled, apparently, he was the cook.

when i finally gave up on my meeting, i walked to the counter to pay for my coffee and i said,
he didn't show.

the cook says,
i'll take you out.
and i smiled.

i need vets. are you a vet?

and i talked to just about everyone in that cafe today. i left my contact info in the hopes that some unsuspecting vet would come across it and save the day.

i don't want a date with anyone at this point. i have too much to do.
it was nice being reminded, it's always nice being reminded that people are interested, but essentially i've got too much going on.

the only reason why the last person got my digits was because i was unsuspecting. i had no idea what to make of it. and it confirmed a few of my suspicions, or rather, made me aware of a few of my preferences at this point. so i'm grateful for the assistance.

tomorrow, back to paterson, back to the city streets.

and today, i went to my attorney's office, she walked right up and was touching my necklace. i have a peso that was made into a medallion coupled with a chakra necklace which, as i've said
is a rainbow tambien.

i like people who aren't afraid to touch. to be curious as children. and to draw near.

those are the people i tend to trust.

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