scrambling

with proper care, even a feeder fish can grow into something noteworthy. watching my kid's diminutive koi, as we call it, whose bowl i freshened before bed, i notice the particular ease with which it glides. the lidless eyes searching the scoured bowl for something, anything. goldfish are notorious eaters, i guess all fish would eat what is found, but i think goldfish are the worst.

and then there's our lovely, angry betta. perhaps not angry so much as displaying. it's quite impressive. a gorgeous little diversion. in looking for a picture, i found out that these are siamese fighting fish. don't know why that surprises me.

i'm going in to cover my boss' shift and she's taking mine, which is good and bad. i wanted to work with the girl i was closing with because she's kewl. i like her. she's got amazing energy. but, we switched it up, and now i'm working in a completely different vibe. this is why i like not knowing who i'm working with because then i don't come in to it expecting anything, or with any preconceived notions. i just roll with it.

was supposed to have a meeting today but had to reschedule and it works out because the man i was meeting with had me on his calendar for next week, not this week. i hate to waste my time like that. i would have been sitting in a cafe waiting for them to show up. the trouble with rescheduling is, it shortens the amount of time i have to get done what i need done. i trust it will all be well.

gives me a bit more time to prepare. and i have a packet due in a couple weeks, need to knock that out. i've been contemplating the revision work she's asking me for, and, well, there's nothing there yet. it doesn't seem one can reenter a stream at the same place one left it. the location may be identical, but the waters have changed, the feel of it. so too with these, i have to immerse myself again. and it's my own damn fault.

i have to believe things work out for the best. that we enter each other's lives for reasons and leave when it's time. my aim with everyone i love is to leave loving them. to let them go in peace. i don't want difficulties and hard feelings to be the remainder. i want peace. more than anything. and so, for me, it is easier to leave in peace.

must go, enter my day before the details get ahead of me.